Intro
This is my life as I experience and remember it. Many people came into my life and many I will mention (without name).
I have tried to incorporate as many stories that I enjoyed, that have impacted me, that were directional to my life path, that made me grow, that made me angry etc. Many interesting stories that I have forgotten didn’t made it to the current webpage. If you remember a funny story etc. that I could ad here, please remind me via email.
In my weakest moments, there were sometimes ‘other kind of people’ who tried to influence me, but didn’t know who I was, as also I forgot 1 period. When the force came back, these voices silenced.
I hope you enjoy my life (story), as I do (the difficult parts a bit less..)
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Oostende, the queen of coastal cities, 1980
My name is Miguel Milo Depuydt. I was born on the coast, in 1980, in Oostende. I love—among other things—the sun, the sea, and sports. I lived in a neighborhood with great childhood friends, and we ‘operated’ from ‘our little square,’ a park, our ‘meeting ground.’ We often went to the beach and the see, specific to ‘De 3 Gapers’.
A sudden move, a bit inland, brought an end to all of this. The pleasant, familiar surroundings of sun, sea, and beach were suddenly completely in the past, and I had to adapt to a very different environment. For the rest of my secondary education, I enjoyed playing sports in my after-school hours. At the end of high school, I probably would have gotten in a difficult situation concidering how o proceed in life, if not there was my sport teacher who was telling me about the professionalism and green beauty of the Leuven University sport department. Eventually I decided to start Master in Sport Sciences. Then I moved to Leuven. A wonderful experience. It was also a very educational experience in terms of personal development.
The kite professor, 1999
In Leuven, I met Belgian and international students. Several became lifelong friends.
My student residence was close to the sport fields and close to some Aula’s where professors gave us theorie classes. The residence was at the beginning of Heverlee wouds. Beautiful there. There I learned several international students and some became friends for life. 1 guy came to Leuven, couldn’t speak a word of Netherlands. The first year he didn’t went to University but studied Netherlands, in combination with basic work to provide fo him self.
The second year he started University. He finished his year I think Magna Cum Laude. After that he became a professor a professor and teached at University of Leuven. But this wasn’t enough and besides that he developped a succesful business. If I remember good it was because of my intense love for windsurfing he started windsurfing, and during my ‘medical time out’ my preaching of a new watersport, he started that to. I found a photo from the year 2000. The kite professor is standing.
S, the Bularian connection, 1999
Especially 1 other guy, who also lived at my dorm, became also a good friend. He also had a simular challenging start of his Belgian study career just like the kite professor. We started together a very imprtant stadium in our live (study) and lived several years close to each other. We knew good times, bad times, went to travel together, this creates a bond. You will also find him on a picture, on the back of a motorbike.
Den Bobo, 1999
In the second year in Leuven I started to get to know ‘den Bobo’ better and better. (this is not his real name..) Many of us coast guys go to the Gent, Belgium University which is closer.
We guys from the coast province seem to come together when we go tot the more further located Katholic University Leuven, Belgium.
Together with 2 other guys, Bobo came from the secundary sportschool (in Meulebeke, Belgium). They were good trained guys with a knowledge of most sports which were teached at the university.
I was mainly trained in eastern sports and was almost a newbe in many sports. Especially the first year I had to train and study 101% to pass the first year in june. (without re-examinations) I was a happy man.
Mathias became more famous when there was the 800 meter run test. The 800 meter is kind off a hard run, here is why:
Physiological extreme strain (pain)
Anaerobic vs. Aerobic: The race is approximately (60-70%) aerobic (with oxygen) and (30-40%) anaerobic (without oxygen). This means that your body acidifies extremely quickly (lactic acid build-up) while you still have to keep running at top speed.
Lactic acid: The last 200 meters are characterized by intense burning pain in the muscles due to the massive accumulation of lactic acid, leading to a “man with the hammer” sensation in just two laps.
Mathias has a length of maybe 1m70. 800 meter runners are normally 1m80 to 1m90. Although he was one of the shortest runners in his poule, this didn’t seem to be a problem. Something very strange happened: It seemed like he had small rockets in his shoes. Every step he took, it was like him flying and his stride length was visably a lot longer then what you would expect from a 1m70 guy. Allready in the first round he ran before the pack and eventually set an incredible time.
In and after his VILO Meulebeke time he was kind off a extra ordinary dude who pulled some daring stuff from time to time. In the following years, him and me would spend more time together and he would become a good friend. You can see him on the picture in the paragraph ‘Les quatre Belges, 2000’
Les quatre Belges, 2000
The 3th year in Leuven, 4 of us from the sport faculty had the opportunity to go via the Erasmus program to Marseille. 2 friends, ‘den Bobo’ and Estoen’ a friend of Estoen and me went to Marseille. As ‘les quatre Belges’, we were known in Lumini, the university campus there. Concerning the photo: Estoen is behind the camera.
It was a great experience and a boost for personal development. There I bought my first windsurfing board, sailed for the first time, and climbed for the first time (Les Calanques).
Estoen, 2000
When we left to Marseille, I knew ‘den Bobo’ best. ‘Estoen’ (this is not his real name) a bit less. But this was about to change. Estoen was a guy form the province of Antwerp. These Antwerp guys had a bit of a different culture then Bobo and me, who where from the seaside province. The difference gave our group a particular dynamic. Estoen was specialised in sailing.
In the 4 months we would follow courses at the University of Marseille, Luminy, we also had sailing classes. For Bobo and me this was all new, for Estoen this was probably easy level. One of the first lessons, Estoen had a question for the sailing teacher. This evolved into a rather high level sailing entertaining conversation, between Estoen and the sailing teacher. The fellow french students probably also had little notice of the info that was shared in that converstion. Through this intervention by Estoen, the presence of the four-member Belgian delegation there was clearly established.
Our forth member, ‘de Kraan’ (not his real name) was more into windsurfing. I learned this art also there. In downtown Marseille I could train kick boxing and I tried boxe Francais, a martial art developed in this country.
After 4 interesting months, the four of us went back to Leuven.
The sweet laywer, to good for this world, 2001
A few months after returning from Marseille, I met my first ‘real’ girlfriend in Leuven. That was quite an experience for me; a whole new world opened up. An aspiring lawyer, she walked the catwalks for a retail chain and also worked a few hours as a barmaid. I was very proud.
Many times, I could have been a better friend and lover.
She forgave me.
I did not forgive myself.
Den A3, 2001
I met ‘den A3’, in my third year in Leuven. He had a positive open attitude and social skills to be able to talk with everybody, day and night, and normally they liked him from the first moment.
I was slowely opening to the world and started to like the party scene, like him. We spended a lot off nights at the oude markt, faculty bars, parties from the faculties etc. Many beautiful memories. (a faculty is for ex. the community of student doctors, student psychologists, etc)
Den A3 could use a large almost all timer Volvo break we used to go wavesuring in Biaritz and Portugal in the summer. There we had the party atmosphere we loved so much in Leuven and the surf scene in the day. This were truly diamond memories.
Den bobo, Estoen and me 2001
After we came back from Marseille, Den bobo, Estoen and me went to rent an appartment in Leuven in ‘De burgemeesterstraat’. Next to the motorcycle garage.
Watersport centre 2004, the player resort
After my studies, I went abroad during the summer seasons to work at watersports clubs.
This were truly almost life changing experience full of sun, wind, joy, international contacts, enhancing your personal development etc.
Right from the first year, in Turkey, I was placed directly in a team of 8, up to 12 watersport members in high season.
My life existed of giving windsurf lessons, going to have fun windsurfing and wakeboarding during our pauzes. After ours and early in the morning practising for stage performances during evening shows. After the shows time for a drink and party.
In a total animation team of around 50 people. Our watersport manager, I will call him mister J, was national champion monoski and was excepional sportive. A bear of a man who, at his modest age, still seemed able to challenge a small army. The entire animation team consisted of approximately 50 people. The entire resort had a capacity of 2,000 beds. It covered the area of a small city with 3 bays. I was dropped into a pool of players who, especially during high season, partied and ‘hunted’ almost every night as if it were their last night. This first season, in particular, influenced me (far) away from the common way of developping into a monogamous family man..
Winter seasons
During the winter season, I worked primarily as a fitness instructor in the Leuven area and also as a snowboard instructor.
‘The refined fitness model teacher’ 10/2004
My ‘player education’ from abroad influenced me also in my winter Leuven seasons.
To give an idea of the changes that the first season in that 5 start resort a.k.a small town with 3 bays can do with a man: At the university we had several post university fitness ladys, teachers, who where instruction us. One of them, let’s call her the ‘the refined fitness model teacher’ was a lady that turned many mans heads.. Me at the time, was a former diligent student newly introduced in the party life. After my 1st season abroad I was allowed to work at the university fitness center. The first day I came, still very bronzed from the season with trained, muscular body, still in windsurf teacher mentality, with my motorjacket on and helmet in hands. The ‘refined fitness model teacher’ came to me in the private room in the fitness for people who worked there, the fitness instructors. She said hi and expressed her surprise. She almost couldn’t recognise the student from before. (the former diligent student) I told her where I had been the last 8 months.
She said something like ‘hola you became a guy where a girl would like to be with / have a relation with.
I was very surprised to hear that because 1) I heared she had a relationship, and 2) she said that to me? Who was the ‘refined fitness model teacher girl that made many heads turn? The refined fitness model teacher girl, who we all admired, said this words to the before slightly shy ‘former diligent student’ ..
Summer abroad / Winter fitness, snowboard and the next kick
Those summerseasons abroad, in combination with winters in Leuven & teaching in the snow, were good times. Yet inwardly, I was often restless and looking for the next thrill.
I sought refuge in action, speed, and much of what young life had to offer, and pushed the boundaries of it.
Watersportcentre Cambrills
After Turkey, I went to work in a watersport centre in Cambrills. This is a city close to partytown Salou. I went there on my motorbike. (Suzuki GSXR 750) Next to windsurf lessons, I would been asked to also teach guests in Catamaran sailing. The motorbike was super usefull for the many nightly trips to partyplace Salou.
Watersportcentre Naxos
After Spain I went to work in the big watersport centrum Flisvos in Naxos. This was a great place. A good working big school windsurf centre.
We 3 windsurf teachers had also some great moments after work when could windsuf just for fun. Naxos has also a rather nice nightlife. My parents came to visit in highseason. I saw they were intensly enjoying the summer vibe of this island. I remember 1 day they rented a 2 seated kinda quad (with a loud exhaust system) and my father visibly enjoyed the excitement and adrenaline.
Watersport centre Karpathos, the Wind island
After Naxos I went to work in Karpathos, a other Greek island. Karpathos a stunning Greek island in the Dodecanese group, famed as a premier windsurfing and wingfoiling hitspot.. Its high mountains and a strong regional summer thermal wind called the Meltemi combine to create powerful, reliable winds—peaking over 30 knots—driven by a natural Venturi effect.
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Sudden end of heaven
However, all of this would come to a very sudden end. When I was on Karpathos, I got seriously injured and paralyzed. A helicopter took me to a hospital in Rhodes.
2 months Intensive care hospital UZ Gent 2007
A few weeks later, I was admitted to the intensive care unit of the University Hospital in Ghent. I remember almost nothing of this period.
The brunette in my head 2007
There was one thing I do remember. Frequently, a young lady with long brown hear wondered ‘in front of my eyes’. I could often see her like in a really concious dream. She looked carefull and sweet. With the help of a professional headprint designer like in police series, I am sure I could have produced a very clear image of her. After some digging, it seemed that a young nurse with brown hear did actually worked there the time I was there. I was told she had putted much more effort then her colleges for me and I wrote her a letter of thanks.
The semi skeleton 2007
I rembemer she frequently tried to give me food. If I remember correcly, it’s been said they place a diner plate next to my bed, but because I was kind’of uncouncious and this plate remained untouched.
My sister said when she saw me arriving in the Universitary hospital Gent, I was scary thin to emaciated. This explaince the constant effort of this brunette with the long brown hair to feed me.
I remember I during the summerseasons I did a lot of teaching, a lot of windsurfing and also weight training. I was in good shape and several weeks of paralisation and malnutrition turned me into half of a skeleton.
I also remember that they were realy wondering why my hands were full of calluses. Because of the constant keeping tight of the boom of a surfsail. I remember when I got a bit tired in highseason, sometimes when I jumped and unhooked, I lost grip of the material and it just flew higher in the sky.
14 months K7, hospital UZ Gent 2007-2008
After I regained some consciousness, I was admitted to the ‘K7’, the rehabilitation center. Learning to speak, getting out of my wheelchair, occupational therapy, etc. It was an intense time with many challenges, but given the professional and enthusiastic guidance from the team, the weekly visits from my mother, and the 2-weekly visits from my then-girlfriend, I also have many beautiful memories of this period.
Thinking without your middle leg 2008
This paragraph is a bit more medical, sexual. It is the border of how I like to tell my life, but I think it is interesting how my behavior changed due to hormonal influences. If you do not feel like reading this kind off stuff, please go to the next chapter ‘Real world and insomnia’ (another not so light medical paragraph, but not ‘sexual’. )
The 1st year in the hospital , after my accident, my body didn’t had ‘wet dreams’ or ‘baby making fluid’. Suddenly, after 14 months hospital, in november 2008, exact the night of my birthday, the baby fluid making came back. About this first 14 months: because there was less ‘baby making hormone stuff available, I seemed like thinking less with the middle leg and I could think more with my heart. The difference was so big, my then girlfriend said afterwards ‘my behavior was not normal a.k.a. way to sweet ..
Real world and insomia
This paragraph is a bit heavy medical. If you feel like reading a light story, you an skip to the middle of the next paragraph.
After a year and a half at UZ Ghent, I moved to Leuven with my then-girlfriend. The sudden transition from a long time in Intensive Care and the K7 unit to a KUL environment was a major step out of my comfort zone. In hindsight, my decision was perhaps on the edge of medically justifiable, and I developed increasingly severe insomnia, but I tried to ignore it. Until the severity forced me to re-evaluate my plans. I was able to recover at my parents’ house. A very intense 6-month period followed during which I tried to overcome this affliction. These 6 months felt heavier than the 16 months of hospital.
Internal motivation 2009
After 6 of the toughest months of my entire rehabilitation and intense ‘sleep/wake’ training, I began to notice significant improvement. I had started to adopt a strict sleep schedule with a fixed (very early) hour to go to sleep and a fixed (very early) hour to get up. And after about 6 months, quite suddenly, in just a few days, I got up and felt like a positive shift or something had happened, and I was more hopeful about the future. I started an intensive rehabilitation program independently, step by step, initially based on healthy sleep, healthy nutrition, intense spaced physiotherapy, and ‘self-reliance’. My day started early in the morning with breathing exercices, meditation, reading,.. and after that taichi. After that sport fysiotherapie and strenght training.
The rehabilitating art of cooking 2010
I could still do very little at the time, also not going to the supermarket, but I managed to take the first steps of cooking independently. I asked my mother to learn to make some tasty dishes independently. I slowly started learning more and more dishes and started putting them into an 8 week schedule. Every 8 weeks, spaghetti, pommes dauffines with turkey fillet, queen’s snack, macaroni, pizza pollo… This 8-week schedule helped me, because sometimes I did not feel like cooking, but this 8 week sceduale helped me as a guide and when I then enjoyed the nice meal I made, I was allways happy afterwards I did make it.
In the early years, when I could do very little outside the home, I regularly watched a movie to relax. My preference was for action films, comedies and romantic films. Someone once told me that I was in favor of ‘feel good’ films. So even action films that have a somewhat positive approach.
Car and physiotherapie 2011
Although I could not yet walk normally outdoors, I was able to drive a car. I retook my driving test and eventually bought one of my parents’ cars. At a certain point I felt strong enough to go to the sports physiotherapist who my head doctor at the U.Z. Ghent k7 had suggested to me. I started to do my fysiotherapie at home. I decided to, from monday to saturday, every morning and afternoon to do a physiotherapy session. So my first years at home (after those 6 months of sleep deprivation) consisted of getting up early, a morning physiotherapy session, an afternoon physiotherapy session, going to the physiotherapist twice a week, preparing my dinner independently, regularly watching a feelgood film and going to bed early.
Washing, ironing and shopping 2011
Step by step I also started to learn how to wash, how to iron, how to keep your room tidy and mop,…
Ma: The Holy Providence (Dutch: de heilige voorzienigheid)
If I had any questions, my mother was always ready with a practical and friendly answer.
Shopping
A while later, shopping independently was the next step. Luckily I had the ‘shopping car’ that offered some stability. Before my accident, I would have found the following words strange, but I found satisfaction in bringing a shopping bag full of goodies to prepare delicious food for the next few days.
Tai chi 2012
In my quest to speed up my rehabilitation, I took the tai chi flyer my father had shown me to heart and went to an initiation class. Although this was much calmer than the sports I had done before my accident, it still appealed to me. The way of teaching was much more focused on internal development and the teacher himself demonstrated a great insight into human training, insight into human weaknesses, etc. which most likely came from his years of tai chi training.
My week became a bit more varied; I also went to tai chi training twice a week.
Besides that I also slowly started doing my own shopping besides the supermarket.
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Miss kite professor, the shower of love and sweetness 2013
Around 2012, still walking difficult in public places, speaking difficult, but driven by my love for watersport and the KULeuven friends pulling me to the water, I made my first encounters with the water.
One of this days, the kite professor, who recently met his girlfriend, would drive to the sea so we 3 could meet.
I do not know if it was because I didn’t saw beautiful ladys from close the last 5 years, or this beautiful lady was so super welcoming, interested about me, or maybe the kite professor who had told stories about him and me from before the accident, that sparkled his girlfriend, but the level of overwelming love and sweetness I received in this first encounter was almost overwelming.
She also studied the first year Netherlands in Belgium and then perceived a career in business and marketing.
After this first beach encounter, she came sometimes with the kite professor to the see. Sometimes I went to Leuven to visit them. The unearthly beauty and love I received that first beach day encounter was an unicum probably also constructed by the nature of a ‘first time’, but the next encounters were simulary pure 100% love driven. She married the kiteprofessor. Children followed.
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Fitness Watewy 2014
Around this time I also decided to go in the morning to the Watewy fitness center. Managed by an entertaining sir. Managed by a Junior Belgian Champion, with the hart for the sport. More moderate in the mornings, more hardcore in the evening. I went there twice a week in the morning. I thought it was a nice atmosphere. My life became richer and more filled with social contact. I did this for several years, until I started my business (see down) and continued strength training early in the morning at home. A bigger part were exercises with my own body weight. I paid more attention to sports physiotherapy and fine motor skills training.
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Tinder 2014
Around 2014, my social life was still limited after 19h to often wathing to (feel good) comedys, romcoms and action movies . At that time I could not easily walk independently outside the home and from the articulation of my talking you could still clearly hear that I was in recovery. Someone I knew from Leuven had invited me to a party at his parents’ apartment in Oostduinkerke, a second home. That was a serious step out of my comfort zone, but I knew several people good from my student life who would be there. Good friends and several acquaintances, from my time in Leuven. It was a happy reunion. Tinder was one of the topics of conversation. Tinder was new to me. My good friends were full of praise for it and advised me to create a profile too. That evening I had the feeling that it was a bit early for me, given my physical condition. What would ladies see in me, not working, not being able to talk properly, not being able to walk properly? That night I stayed overnight in that apartment. I didn’t sleep much that night as the subject of Tinder was still very much in my mind. That next morning I made my decision and announced it to my friends. I would also go on tinder. I loved the single life before my accident and I had intended to make this clear at all times.
My friends were happy with my decision. I had maintained my sleep hygiene for years, trained and regularly watched films for relaxation. I knew little or nothing about social life, making a profile and Tinder.
They gave me advice on creating a Tinder profile and that was the start of a new adventure.
An adventure in terms of my ‘limited’ life: the first conversations started. At first I wasn’t totaly at ease, but when I noticed to my surprise that ladies were sometimes interested in talking, my self-confidence increased somewhat. I remember the sentence: ‘Oh yes, nice, it’s not directly about sex for once’. Sex wasn’t on my mind at the time either. Getting a simple kiss on the cheek or giving a kiss on the cheek almost never happened in my life the last years.
After several months of conversations, a date came with a lady. Since I still couldn’t walk properly or talk properly, this was a very exciting event. I had clearly talked about my physical limitations in our conversations, but I was still very concerned about her reaction. That turned out better than I expected. It remained a pleasant meeting. Several more followed. My intention to always clearly state that I had no intention of a permanent relationship was not always easy to express. Often nice encounters, sometimes a further encounter, the first years nothing physical. Which was ok in my condition. After some years ‘my interest’ evolved a bit.
Surfclub Windekind Groenendijk Oostduinkerke
In addition, I once again experienced the joy of learning a new water sport step by step. I remember the first years at the club. I rembember to spend many many hours on the beach, getting a feel of the kite.
I could barely walk and when I was carring my board and kite from the car to the club it must of been a less then gracefull view… One day, the club manager saw this and said he would put me on the waiting list for a storage box to lock up my kite material in the club and not having to carry it around every time.
I remember the first years, maybe because I could barely walk or talk and even more on the water I couldn’t get on the board, no other member talked to me as I also was not so talkative.. But then, after I do not know how many hours in the water, one day, I had the kite in the air, pulled it into the power zone (kinda technical term) and this lifted me out of the water and I stayed on the board. 1 meter, 2 meters, 5 and then a drop. What a feeling. This session I went up to 10 meters or so. And very ‘strange’: from that moment on, this day, although I hadn’t really spoken to other kiters before, I had maybe 3 short talks with people, after this session. My idea is that many surfers who saw I had difficulty walking, difficulty talking and for months didn’t seem to make progress on the water, suddenly could stand a bit. So the endurance of this disabled dude was not so random, not so stupid leading nowhere, but with a purpose finally being achieved a bit. From that day on I slowly became ‘one of the members’. A guy loving the kitesport.
The sport teacher / lifeguard / swim & tennis teacher / kiter and me
In this period I met another starting kitesurfer, a sport teacher, lifeguard, swim teacher and tennis teacher, who lived a bit between me and the club. The next years we drove a lot to the club together and had some good times. He seemed to be a good harted positive hombre. He had a good nose for good kite material deals and via him we bought some good low wind stuff were we had great low wind summer days with.
KULeuven for life 2015
In Leuven I met several guys who I lived many years with and encounter together the partys, the exam stress, the motorbike cop stories, the motorbike court adventures, the girlfriend stories, the fight stories, the travel adventures and so on. After the accident, I often went to Leuven. When my motor skills were a bit better we engaged again together in watersports. The pic below was taken in my second home. Somewhere on the picture you will find the kiteprofessor and the baywatch kiter, who I met there on the beach. There is the always good harted, friendly mountainbiker / jetskier and finally another business man, also full of energy, a giant of a man, who went to search his luck and love in the south.
The sweet business lady 2016
During a sunny somer period, I met an interesting lady with whom I had a good feeling with from our first meeting. Normally you would think my ‘post accident virgin status’ would be a confidence set back’. But with this connection all felt natural and I felt she loved me how I was. And I forgot my many areas of revalidation. (I forgot them so much my recovery training went downwards) This girl was kinda interesting and out of the ordinary especially in the boy-girl departement. This period was out of my comfort zone in a heavenly way. The last years I have been training massage and also a bit tantra and I was happy I had something to bring to the table. After some time, as a lady of the world with her management job, she motivated me to do something with this massage skills. But as heavenly as this period was, as dark was the time after, when we realised we where on a different path with different near future and far future goals. I remember after this serperation, I was in a really cloudy, not to say dark place.. I also stopped going to the surfclub etc..
The public transport responsable & kiter 2016
So, after the paths of the sweet business lady and me diverged, I was in a dark place for what seemed like a long time.
1 windy day, suddenly I got a call from a fellow kitesurf compadre, who asked me if I didn’t feel like going kitesurfing. This guy was a super friendly, cool, good kitesurfer. He had a job with the biggest public transport company in Belgium. Most of us kiter dudes and dudies from my age know who I mean.
I felt like a wreck and would not fit in this surfing atmosphere. But I still decided to give it a try. We met somewhere at a point between the place I lived at the time, his place and the see. I still wondered to wich degree he must have felt my ‘low level of wordly hunger’. Then at the see magic happened. The moment I arrived at the see, my head cleared and at the end of the afternoon, I felt like nothing bad ever had happened. Very nature – powerfull stuff. When I went to my parents home again, clouds came back, but the memory of that day was still very there and soon after I went again and after several times, the dark cloud, after ‘wild girl experience’ was fading away and I got back on – training – track, in combination with going to the surfclub.
The sweet business lady and me seperated in a friendly way and have kept a distand connection. When clouds cleared up again, I remembered her true harted feeling and advise to do something with these skilss and so I finally took action and took my first steps direction the working field.
Beginner kite level 2017
As time continued, I finally managed to achieve a basic kitesurf level. The surfclub manager came sometimes to the seaside to take pictures and the picture below is one of them.
Zen training, massage studying
After my accident, in combination with my breathing and meditation exercices, I felt ‘internally more in the zone’, a bit more often (taking my rehabilitation level into account). Although that wild streak from the past would regularly pull me ‘out of the zone’ while learning to kitesurf.
During my recovery of more than 15 years, I have been challenged on many levels. I went in search of a way of life that leads to health. I was obliged to use all my willpower and knowledge of the human body to accelerate my recovery.
During my rehabilitation, I discovered the positive effects of receiving massage, and I started to delve deeper into it.
VDAB – Starterslabo 2017
Around 2016, 2017, I started to wanting earn money and to contribute to society. My father was strongly against that because of his fear that when I would start working, I would loose this gouvernemental aid.
Anyway, I went to the VDAB. There they listened to what I had to offer and what were my goals. After they listened they seded me via Roeselare direction starterslabo. They have a faculty for every province.
Miguel Milo 2018
One night, I had an intense dream to get a domain name for a website. This dream was very clear. so the next day allready I took proper action towards some website hosting company. I started learning how to develop a website, besides further massage education. Also I was allowed into an intense governemental program to develop me towards business. After 10 years of rehabilitation, I started as a professional masseur.
The yin yoga teacher 11/2018
In starterslabo, I was in the department Kortrijk. Every provence had its department. Starterslabo also operated via an over facebook communication page. Via this page I encountered the yin yoga teacher. This was a very sweet, spiritually evolved girl with long, long blond hear. We soon felt at ease communicating and the first weeks every day 1 hour or more whatsapp video calling. One day, I went to visit her in Limburg. After several meetings we got physical and one day, we kissed for 2 hours. I never had such an intense experience and it felt great, intense and deep. But no physical connection ‘below the belt’. Until.. One day I went to visit her, I think it was on the day of my birthday. We had again a nice time together. When it became dark, I said her I would drive home. The moment I went to the door, she grabbed my arm. I was a bit surprised by her sudden, rather fast physical movement. Because she wanted to give me my birthday present.
A business proposition from a sweet lady 1/2019
In starterslabo, I was preparing my business to go in spring 2019 to contact interesting Welness centra for potential cooperation.
Even before spring 2019— february 2019— I received an polite and professional email from a lady, owner of a wellness massage center close to me. ….In it, she asked me if I would like to work together with her for duo massages (2 clients, 2 massage therapists, same time)
At that time, I still mainly had the ’13-years recovery vibe’. This request, made in a respectful and sweet manner, was the beginning of a very pleasant collaboration.
At this time, my gait was still somewhat visually limited. Likewise, my speech was still audibly limited. The early stages of the collaboration with the sweet ’12/2018 lady’ also helped my confidence to towards several other wellness and massage centers.
Several years followed in which I was able to experience both the challenges and the freedom of starting out as a self-employed professional.
I expanded my services to at home massages.
More collaborations were forged.
It is my mission to pass on the beneficial effect of receiving massages that I have experienced to other people.
The 12
Around the time I started getting more and more evolved in expanding my business, some more ‘ancien kiters’ seem to come less to the club and several ‘+- my age new kiters’ came in. Most of ‘the’ 12 had a storage box. They created a whatsapp group and I was taken in this whatsapp group. In the beginning we were with 12 if I remember good. A cool, motivated group of kiters who were up to date with the latest evolutions, with good humour, etc and this lifted up my motivation to.
Until then kite progress was only possible when I remained faithful to my physiotherapy and maintained my training structure. This would be more and more true the further I developped.
Dream girl 12/2020
Above all, now that I started participating in social / working life again, I met various massage therapists with whom I mostly had short polite, funny, interesting conversations with.
In one welness center, I met a very special lady. After every short conversation with her, the next days life seemed to a bit more sunny. I knew what was happing. I started to fall in love. After a while, a date came. Soon after another, and another,.. Although we both said we did not wanted a ‘real relation’ yet, our bond grew so strong that afterseveral months we could not deny what we had was acually called a relationship. I experienced infatuation and love that seemed to last. A lady with whom I had wonderful times, a lady who embodied extremes. Graceful, sweet, and wise on the one hand, while on the other she loved exotic dance, racing sports, water sports… I was happy and proud.
I remember a quote from the lifeguard-schoolteacher kiter during my period with dreamgirl: ‘Miguel, since you are together with ‘dreamgirl’, when we are driving to the surfclub, you never shout anymore again like, ‘oh look at this nice lady walking there !’ …
I won’t say the constant interaction with sometimes very good looking massage therapist ladys with soft hands, was never distracting. Especially when clients had traffic problems and came like 20′ later what gave us the possibility to do some massage exchange. But I never went to bed with another girl or kissed another lady during my time with dreamgirl.
Many family guys pull this trick of for decennia. Still, me, as a recovering ex ‘Costa dude’ with in before my accident a player overload surrounding me abroad, currently surrounded by massage girl therapists, I was a little, little bit proud of that.
At the beginning of my Tinder adventure I wrote I had the intention to always honestly say to girls I was still in heavy recovery and was not ready for a ‘family man’ relationship. During my time with dream girl, this changed. This was the first lady in a long time with who I could have a really long relation with, and agreeing with never going to bed with another lady again.
As a post accident semi virgin this time, 2021, I wouldn’t rush into things. We followed the budhistic tantric ritual ‘de 7 veils’ (7 sluiers) where every +- 1 month (mooncycle) you go to ‘the next level’ and have a bit closer, more intimate interaction with eachother.
This whole ‘7 sluiers experience with dream lady was one of the best, sweetest, loving, sexual experiences I ever had with a lady.
Next to her inner greatness, she was an attractive lady.
She was a couple of years older then me but she had the body that many ladies who where 20 years younger would be jalous of.
In the past, around the time I started with Tinder, (still severly disabled) I start slowely slowely with tantra workshops.
This dream girl, also massage therapist, was all ready diving deeper into tantra and was following an intensive, long term tantra education.
In a renowned Belgian tantra school that also has been featured in a TV documentary some time ago.
For sure the tantric awareness we had also added to the sexual tension that was builded during our ‘7 sluier’ ritual.
So, good times returned more and more after my accident.
2 years at the dark side of the moon
After more than 10 years of training to learn to walk and then starting a business (combined with further training), I thought I had seen the most intense challenges. This turned out not to be the case in late 2023–2024.
(I am not saying renovation won’t cause some more financial stress, but this 100% own buy of this house in nature, possible because of smart en short term financial intelligence felt like a real victory.)
I started physiotherapy again, then step by step the rest of my training and the next steps. All this now combined with a more active financial awareness.
The decision to buy that chalet in the forest district—and the purchase itself—was the initial, primary ‘switch’ that put me back on ‘the right path.’
Shortly after that, I decided to start physiotherapy again.
And preferably with someone specialising in my type of paralysis. Moreover, I was looking for a practice where—in addition to the guided exercises during sessions—I could continue practising those same exercises independently in the same or a separate gym area.
I simply couldn’t bring myself to train at my parents’ house anymore, or to give them the satisfaction of seeing a son who was working on himself.
After all, they refused to contribute a single euro to help me build my life the way I wanted to.
THEIR SIDE: Every story has two sides, and this one is no exception. In 1995, when my sister and I were just entering puberty, my parents moved us away from the coast to Tielt (postal code 8700) because of growing concerns about rising sea levels. That is also why, when I considered moving to Oostduinkerke between +-2017 and 2023, I couldn’t get any support from my parents; nor were they keen on the idea of me moving elsewhere in the country. The reason was that I often set ambitious goals and made bold plans—only to run into trouble, especially given my situation as a paralyzed person undergoing intensive rehabilitation (for example, in 2009, after 16 months at UZ Ghent, I immediately moved to the center of Leuven with my girlfriend at the time). Consequently, my parents were willing to help me buy a home, but only in the area around Tielt—the very place I had been brought to during my teenage years and for which I felt little attachment.
That aside regarding the financial help—or ‘non-help’.
We were just talking about the purchase of my first home—the chalet in the Ardennes—and how I was finding myself again and looking for a good physiotherapist and practice.
Practice Corpius met all my criteria.
The owner of Practice Corpius happened to be on maternity leave when I arrived, so I saw a different physiotherapist for a few weeks.
Once her maternity leave ended, I had my first session with her. It was a good session.
What stuck with me most from that first session was what happened right after the initial physiotherapy appointment:
(Side note: those two years of ‘shutting out the world’—from late 2023 to late 2025, also meant that women were no longer on my ‘list of interests’.)
But back to early 2026 and that first physiotherapy session with the owner of Praktijk Corpius.
Afterward, as I drove home, I suddenly found myself noticing attractive women—women who looked very sweet and very cool.
I’ve thought about the causes of this big change of mind…
I believe that her feminine energy (even though she remained strictly professional) ‘awakened’ my own ‘masculine energy’ on an energetic level—or something to that effect—causing attractive, sweet-looking, and cool-looking women to suddenly come back into my field of vision.
I spent several months there rebuilding my motor skills, and by the spring of 2026, the paperwork was finalised and I moved house. This brought those pleasant and beneficial physiotherapy sessions to an end.
Around that time—partly due to the swimming sessions at the Windekind surf club at the start of the 2026 season—the physiotherapy sessions were replaced (in May and June 2026) by a gradual training build-up, aimed at one day—hopefully in the near future—participating in an 1/8 triathlon.
The AS Adventurer
I met the AS Adenturer around 2004 when I was working as a fitness instructor in the Leuven area during wintertime. He came for some fitness information. But soon we had a interesting conversation about our passions etc. We became friends. From time to time our converstations about the passions in life was continued in the entertaining nights in Leuven. Many years later, during my recovery, our contact was less. I place his paragraph here, because a bit after my immo buy and the restart of my training in winter 2025-2026, I sended him a happy birthday and from then on our communication had a revival. He also became a cryto trader so this was another point of communication. I call him here the AS adventurer because next to his extensive knowledge about plants, small and big animals, he also put his knowledge in practice and often made adventurous kind’off survival trips trough nature. For ex. one of his last trips was to Madagascar. Also his knowledge of survial came in handy when I bought the chalet to renovate in the Ardennes and when I was looking for an rather comfortable stay for the saterday to sunday nights during my weekends surf trips at the Belgian coast. When I started training again more and more, my basic walking came back and the evening going out slowely was on the point of coming back and I felt the fun, laid back open social fun interaction we had in the past in Leuven, coming back.
In the spring of 2026, after a severe relapse of 2 years, I had already started physiotherapy a few months earlier, but walking outdoors in crowded places was still very difficult. But for some administral reasons I had to go to the beach office.
Although it had been 10 years since I had such difficulty moving from the parking lot to the surf office, I was again in the same spot.
In the middle of the way I stopped at the surfbar to have a drink. Behind the bar was the club manager, visibly happy to see me back in his club. It surprised me a bit I got so well received with open arms.
Ater the drink I hobbled further to the surf office. Next to the surf office were several kitedudes having a drink. They welcomed me as warm as the manager. This surprised me again because I knew them maybe a little less from the many winter and summer sessions together. Even the kiter / computer analist of the club, with whom I taught I had a more strictly formel communication, was welcoming and friendly. I maybe had a 30 minute chat before I walked in for the beach office to do the administration.
I was truly amazed, pleasantly surprised, and afterwards moved by the camaraderie among surfers, where the love for water sports far transcends (my) physical limitations.
Sometimes events are so intense that they deliver a noticeable shock to your current worldview that was formed by ‘2 years in not optimal position’ and bring about a lasting impression and change.
Naish Mutant surfboard 4/2026
The Baywatch kiter and me bought around 2018 the Naish Mutant to learn the art of one directional (like surfboard) kitesurfing.
The twintip has 2 straps (like open shoes) to put your feet in. On a surfboard they put 0 straps, sometimes 1 strap. This is a lot harder than riding a twintip (2 tips, like a snowboard). That in combination with my motor skills who were still limited, made the surfboard kitesurfing still to difficult and I eventually shelved this plan.
Several years later, I finally started what I intended: session 1 with Naish Mutant surfboard. Session 2 with twintip (like snowboard) whenever coditions seem like it.
I was surprised when, on my first time with a surfboard after such a long break, I managed reasonably well to get started on the board for a few meters. I had several simular experiences during this session sometimes adding some meters. The next kitesurf days, I also started a first session with the directional surfboard and I felt like making progress.
The will be dentist and the wanne be (sweet) copgirl 4/2026
After 1 of my first kiteasurfing days after my 2 years recovery set back, I went to the bar for a drink. After I survived this 2 year setback, I seemed to enjoy much more the talks with interesting people. I loved going to the bar more then in the past. In the past I was more like the ‘one track mind’ my sister once described me with. At the bar, some friendly girl served me. I ordered a hot chocolat milk to heat me up and just cause I like it. She told me she was studying in the same university town as I had. Because I loved this town very much this was a first topic of conversation. I fast got the feeling this was a smart, sweat lady with a good hart and I enjoyed our short conversation. After the second chocolate milk I took in 2 times my kitematerial to the car.
At the end of the 2 years set back, I gave up my kitesurf material box in the club. Some months after I gave up the box, I started again, like in the past, to go more and more to the club. I probably better didn’t gave up the material box, but who knew I would find a house with potential in nature so soon.
So now in a 2 times I carried my kitesurf material from the club to the car. After my last walk to the car, a lady came in a carefull way to me. She asked in a friendly manner: Excuse me, did you drink? The first 2 seconds I looked a litle bit surprised to the lady. Then I had to laugh. I understood what was going on. Due to the 2 years setback and now after a day trying to again learn the kitesurfing skills, my body must have been exhausted and the walking, especially carrying the kitesurf stuff, must have give my walk ‘a less then gracefull appearance’.. That might have looked like I had been drinking.
I explained everything, I showed some hard evidence like the parking card and my website who also described the recovery. The lady felt I found it funny so she might have felt a little bit less embarressed.
A previous incident of hers that speaks in favor of her slightly police attitude: perhaps 15 minutes before our conversation, she had seen a clearly drunk person get into the car. Afterwards, she regretted not approaching the person and alerting him to his dangerous behavior.
After this funny encounter we kept on talking and she seemed to be an interesting person working in the educational system, with psycholgical (and spiritual) skills helping schoolkids in their education and development. Maybe an hour later, I left home.
Pre season surfclub swim training 4/2026
During the year, the surfclub organises a various amount of activities, all focused on (water) sport emprovement and fun. Also a weekly swim training with a clearly professional swimtrainer.
When I entered the pool, it surprised me how many clubmembers were joining. I saw a lot of familior ‘beach faces’.
Extra crawl training 4/2026
The Baywatch kiter told me in the past several times about the possibilities of his pool, but it was only after the spring 2026 ‘revival’ following my 2 years dark side of the moon I checked out his swimming pool for extra training.
The paradox of luxury: basic bed but golden sunrise 5/2026
With a little help from an influential man, I was actually able to gain access to a basic bed but vightery close to the sea. As basic as the bedroom was, the feeling upon waking up and experiencing the beauty of nature was immense. The combination of waking up relaxed and feeling the sun and the light breeze was enough to put my body and mind into surf mode. During the third hour, the waves almost exceeded my surfing skills, making getting onto the surfboard increasingly challenging. In the end, I had been in the water for 3 hours. While getting dressed, it turned out that these 3 hours, with their intensely challenging moments, were enough to have an impact on my waistline. When I got dressed, I could ten my belt to the fourth hole, that is 1 further then before.
House warming: BBQ & wakeboarding, 8/2026
To be continued
Regards,
maybe see you soon,
Miguel